In modern morality, love is the ultimate virtue. Love is valued above all things, supposed to be the answer to all problems, and ascribed with almost magical powers. But unfortunately, this has caused many people to put too much focus on love, without even knowing that they were doing something wrong.
If a man told you he was marrying a woman for her money, that would be considered wrong. But why is that? If she has what he wants, isn’t that the perfect basis for a marriage? But of course, it is wrong.
It is wrong because if you marry someone for their money, then you are not marrying them; you are marrying their money. Essentially, you are saying “I don’t want you. I want money. And I will use you for money.”
To marry means to open ourselves up and share our lives with with another human being with their own personality and quirks. But if you don’t want that person, but only their money, you are not opening yourself to them.
The same logic, however, should be applied to love. We should not marry someone for love. Love is a thing that we want, but marriage is about much more than “things.” Marriage is about the person.
What love and money have in common is that neither of them are a person. We should marry for the person, not for love.
Love is important. But it’s never more important than the person.
When we make marriage about an exchange of love and forget how to connect to the person themselves, beyond their love, we don’t bond as a couple should, and remain alone. But when we do connect with each other, we create a bond that will last forever.